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January 3, 2014

Boomer Talk: Getting better

(Continued)

I often think of the advice, “If you do the work you love, the money will then follow.” Well, this has not exactly born true for me. Being self-employed requires constant self-marketing, and most of us are not good at this particular task. For me, getting better in my work life means conquering procrastination and doing some more outreach, the selling of my skills and talents.

Thinking about the body/mind is even more of an obstacle course. The beginning of the new year brings many resolutions in this category. We want to improve our bodies; we want to look and feel better.

We decide we must lose or gain weight, eat better for our health, keep up an exercise program, find a way to get enough sleep. We make promises to ourselves, and most often, our resolve breaks down before January is over. I find it helpful in this regard to think in terms of progress and not perfection. Can I do just a little bit better and take it one day at a time instead of beating myself up for my failure to carry through?

When considering “the mind,” I know I must catch myself going down the dead-end street of worry and doubt, for anxiety brings stress and stress affects the body’s health in so many detrimental ways. I can resolve to become more aware of my negative thought patterns and improve on a positive and optimistic attitude.

It is good in a new year to consider relationships. How can my close relationships with my friends, extended family, parents/children and partners get better? Is there anything wrong that needs fixing? Am I blaming the other person and holding onto resentments? I have learned that when I want a relationship to get better, it is up to me to do something different. Maybe we need some professional counseling, or to find ways to improve how we communicate our feelings, in a nonthreatening way. Or, in some cases, it may be best to leave the relationship behind when it is harmful and cannot be fixed.

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