, Newburyport, MA


December 19, 2013

Hot chocolate and two pieces of advice

It was Christmas Eve at Macomb County Jail.

The entire jail was in a 24/7 lockdown due to a recent riot.

Lockdown can drive the strongest of men and women to insanity.

A sympathetic corrections officer, above and beyond the call of duty, was distributing hot chocolate and cake to each individual cell.

While the officer was performing this act of kindness, the 19-year-old inmate in Cell 301 was screaming a barrage of abusive expletives at the officer:

“Take that … cake … and … your wife and daughter and the sheriff’s wife and his daughter too.”

The diarrhea of the mouth with its bad language was endless.

The officer smiled good-naturedly and continued to distribute the goodies at each individual cell.

As the guard approached the loud-mouthed youth, the lad stopped screaming his chain of smut.

Would this officer penalize this lad for personal comments about wife and daughter?

The officer smiled warmly and said:

“You’re a cute lad. Anyone with your dimples deserves the best of desserts!”

There was no sarcasm in his voice, rather an affectionate tease that a dad might give his son.

“I’m going to give you not one kind of cake but two. Here’s a large slice of cherry cake and a healthy slice of chocolate cake.”

The teenager whispered: “Sweeeeet! Last time we had cake, some maggot stole mine. Know what I’m saying, man? Awesome! Thank you!”

“You’re welcome, son! And, you’re kind of awesome yourself.”

As the officer began to depart, the teen called him back and said:

“Guard, you know that as soon as you get a few feet away, I’m going to start screaming more names at you. It’s the name of the game for new guys. Don’t take it personal, man! OK?”

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